News > The Top Ten Coolest Video Game Characters Ever
April 12, 2007
Who are the top 10 coolest video game characters of all time? Well, I've listed my picks here. You're not going to agree with them all and I'm sure even if you do, you're down to argue about the order. Whatever. Just enjoy.
10. Harman Smith of Killer 7
Smith is a sixty-year-old man who must use his seven personalities to defeat a terrorist group called the Heaven Smile. All seven of Smith's personalities have a lot of, well… personality. He must change from one to another at different stages of the game to kill walking proximity mines. Harman Smith - the schizophrenic, Irish sexagenarian - is probably the most unique video game character ever. Not the coolest...but unique enough to make it on the short list of cool.
9. Link
Link hasn’t uttered a word in all of the years he has been the main character in one of the most popular video game franchises of all time and he represents all of the characteristics of the stereotypical video game hero: a brave kid setting out to save a princess. But who cares? This elf kicks serious ass. Look, for those of you who think he's a tights-wearing pansy, look at his record, folks...he gets himself into some pretty sticky situations, (grew several years older instantly, turned into a wolf, turned into a bunny, got the power to control the seasons) and he never even shows an ounce of fear. Well, sometimes he looks kind of scared, like when he almost got run over by Ganondorf's horse in "Ocarina." But he still saved the princess all without getting his green tunic stained. What’s not to like about Link?
8. 90’s Sonic
Sonic has been pretty lame lately, what with the voice of a second grader trying to do a voice-over for the first time and the fact that most of his recent games have been crap; lately it’s been pretty hard to take Sonic seriously. But when he debuted, dude, Sonic was the essence of cool. That hedgehog cut up robots with his back and stole gold from their stomachs. And did I mention he was fast as hell? I used to get seizures from playing. Now just don’t faint when Sonic gives you the thumbs up That dashing 16-bit hedgehog. You sickos, having a man crush on a digital hedgehog! He's pretty hot though.
7. Kratos
If anyone who has played God of War could describe Kratos in one word, they would all say the same thing, “ Baaaad.” It just slips off the tongue. Baaaaad just happens to be the word that fits the most with Kratos. Kratos is an absolute beast and can take on enemies that are hundreds of times bigger than him without breaking a sweat. He has a huge arsenal of weaponry and could rip you apart by touching you with his pinky finger. He kills gods too and becomes one. That's pretty sweet.
6. King of All Cosmos
There are so many hilarious quotes from the King of All Cosmos. He refers to himself as “We” and sometimes speaks in Esperanto (no one speaks Esperanto). He is perhaps the silliest video game character of all time and to top it all off, his outfits are probably the coolest in video game history. Hopefully Namco will develop a game in which we can play as this character. (Start your grumbling now).
5. Mario
Mario is a plumber who saves princesses as a side job. He also has a sweet mustache. If you disagree, he will stomp you harder than a racist LA cop.
4. Cloud
You know that if an RPG is considered one of the best of all time, the protagonist is going to be cool. Enter Cloud. He does have that hairdo and hammer pants going against him, but other than that, he p3ns. Just look at his Buster Sword and try to deny his coolness. I dare you. What makes him cool? Like I said he starred in the best Final Fantasy game that's been made thus far. Oh, and by the way all you Sephiroth fans, Cloud is way cooler.
3. Ryu Hayabusa
Ryu Hayabusa is the coolest video game ninja of them all. And it doesn’t hurt his reputation that every one of his games have actually been totally sweet, a thing that most long running video game characters can’t usually boast. Even Mario and Link have been in some crappy games. Ryu Hayabusa is very mysterious as he hardly mutters a word during the game. He lets his feet and his numchucks do the talking instead.
2. Duke Nukem
In one of Duke Nukem’s games he is trying to kill a race of aliens for messing up his ride. In another, all of the men of earth, except for Duke, have been killed by aliens. Duke joins the Unified Babe Resistance to save the women of earth from these aliens. Aliens and hot chicks. Dude, this guy is cool. Duke knows he’s so cool that he’s not afraid to show it. In fact, he busts out a new one liner about how he’s so cool about every three seconds. On top of his killer personality he has a killer arsenal of weapons that he also constantly boasts about. Some might call Duke an antihero...I just call him cool.
1. Solid Snake
Solid Snake made Metal Gear’s story the best video game story of all time. If you haven’t played the series, go out and try it, it is one roller coaster of a story. Snake is one cigarette smoking, gadget wielding, snake eating, sneaky dude. His history is so complex that you should take notes in every game if you want to be able to understand the next game in the series. Snake is a an absolute mercenary who only does one thing, kill his enemies. He’s not like most of the other characters on this list who rely on big weapons and muscles. He uses small pistols and takes his enemies out by stealth. He has every characteristic that a good character in any type of story should have. Snake is the coolest video game character of all time. Try arguing, and he'll slice your throat while you're sleeping.
-Josh Stevens
